Join Jeff Bailey and other Yoga Loft folks at the New Year 2018 Resolve to Dissolve!
Starting 10:30 PM
Enjoy community, yoga and open discussion as we bring in 2018
Every new year comes with the opportunity to establish, or perhaps re-establish a resolution for something better.
More often than not, I hear people say they no longer make resolutions because they don’t work. “They” don’t work? Yup, “they” are going to let us down again this year, so why bother making them. It’s as if the resolution is a magical outer force that only “works” at the beginning of a new year. Well, while it is motivational we all know that’s not true.
The only resolution that works is the one that never stops–which means they can be made and reinforced at any time of the year.
But to make a resolution that works, we first need to figure out why they usually fail and let us down.
Resolutions don’t work because they require some sort of behavioral change which suggests that there’s something wrong with the current behavior. Conflict is born the moment this duality is made where one thing is right because another thing is wrong—and self inflicted conflict, no matter how just, is never productive. It really doesn’t matter what time of year it is, when we put conflictual demands on ourselves, the outcome is rarely fruitful and rich. You may very well benefit from changing a certain behavior, but if there is a duality in your mind between who you are now and who you want to be, the result will not be sustainable. And even if it lasts a while, it will come with a feeling of sacrifice, loss of joy and ultimately guilt.
Here’s a New Years resolution that won’t let you down. You can make it at the beginning of the year and remake it all year long and it will serve you in countless ways without fail.
Ready? That’s the only caveat. You have to be ready.
Why not resolve once and for all, “to join?” Our highest yoga is to join by reversing the beliefs and actions that maintain separation. As nebulous as it sounds, once the commitment is made, everything you think and do will have deep meaning. Resolve to watch your mind choose separating thoughts and actions (always fearful, attacking or judgmental) and then realize you have the power to choose against them. Any decision against a fearful thought that separates is automatically a choice for a helpful thought that joins. If you slow down just a little, you will catch yourself in the (separating) act, and you will realize that you have the power to gently correct it before it get’s out of hand.
Let’s use the classic “I want to lose weight” new years resolution as an example. If I fail and don’t lose the weight, then I let myself down. If I succeed then I’m “happy” as long as I can keep the weight off, which not only hinges happiness to outer circumstances, but now I have to maintain it or I’ll let myself down. Both paths lead to guilt which is fearful and separating in nature. The problem is not that I have weight to lose—the problem is that I believe there is a separate self (that is not okay as it is). Whether I succeed or not, I eventually fail. It’s why Oscar Wilde said that “no good deed goes unpunished.” Be careful, the ego puts the hook of separation in everything.
This year, this moment, and every moment thereafter, resolve to dissolve the self-defeating thoughts that separate.
This is the yoga that joins. Never fearful, there is a healed part of your mind that is always kind, appropriate and loving.
From this state of mind, you are resourced and whole. From this joined perspective, there is nothing wrong or right. It just is. It’s accepting. The need to analyze or blame drops away. There’s nothing to figure out and nothing to attain. It sounds frightening and out of control, but it’s not. It’s your mind—the only corner of the entire universe that you can control. Believe it and set a gentle resolution to think and move from this place of joined wholeness. Heal your mind first and let this yoga bring more peace and clarity to your life. Now, From this state of mind, set kind behavioral goals of betterment because with no attachment to the outcome you’ve already succeeded.
We’ll do it together as one.